Esquire Theme by Matthew Buchanan
Social icons by Tim van Damme

21

Sep

me:
i don't even care. i'm not going to talk about this anymore.
...
me:
and you know what else? [2000 word rant]

untexting:

it’s so sad when you crave someone you can’t have

communistbakery:

It’s not a phase mom I really am the next supreme

kawaiigod:

girl: he cheated on me

me: then break up with him

girl: but-

me: bye

(Source: zootedboy)

haleycomet:

i literally never get tired of this post

(Source: yeah-yougotme)

bettywhite4ever:

I wanna be hot enough to make people question their sexual orientation

(Source: andrewbelami)

tarntino:

i never want to get married and have kids i want to be 40 and a highly successful director and show up to my high school reunion dressed entirely in yves saint laurent with blood red lipstick and louboutin heels that could penetrate a man’s soft flesh in the current year’s bmw convertible and wear chanel sunglasses the entire time even while indoors so i don’t have to hold eye contact with the little people

20

Sep

iPhone user:
I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
Android user:
Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
iPhone user:
I just like this pho-
Android user:
The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*

18

Sep

(Source: fyeahthatssoraven)

13

Sep

(Source: clintscottkeller)